Canadian Troops Nearing North Dakota Border 12 hours into Government Shutdown

Published on Oct 1, 2013 in Front Page, U.S.

BISMARK – Local North Dakota state police have reported seeing what appears to be a build-up of Canadian troops at the nation’s border. Many are speculating that this move by Canada was brought aboot by last night’s shutdown of the United States Government. Among the federal employees that are being affected by this shutdown are many members of the US Armed Forces. The Colonel was granted an interview with the Canadian Ambassador in...

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Obama: I have a drone

Published on Sep 12, 2013 in Front Page, U.S.

The Colonel has attended and transcribed Barack Obama’s “I have a drone” speech for the convenience of UK Colonel readers. The speech was delivered on the 50th anniversary of the March On Washington for Jobs and Freedom on Wednesday, August 28th, 2013: I have a drone, that one day, will strike thousands of innocent men, women, and children, and take their lives. And in that drone will be uranium mined by indigenous peoples upon...

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Michigan Senate Makes Most Significant Decision in Centuries

Published on Jun 5, 2013 in Features, Front Page, U.S.

The Michigan Senate has just made one of the most significant decisions in centuries. Tuesday, 4 June, the Michigan Senate voted to recognize “International Talk Like a Pirate Day.” “This decision will have crucial implications on the life of Michiganders,” explained Sen. Roger Kahn (R-Saginaw), the man who proposed the resolution. The Colonel interviewed average Michiganians, asking their thoughts on the recent...

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After No Investigation, U.S. Identifies Boston Bomber as al-Qaeda

Published on Apr 18, 2013 in Features, Front Page, U.S.

Two explosions shook the Boston Marathon, and the country, Monday, 15 April 2013. According to the latest reports, three people died in the attack, and 130 were injured. The identity of the individual or group responsible is as of yet unknown. “We’re working on it,” said Janet Napolitano, U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security. “As of right now, every single person working in the U.S. government and military is working on figuring out who...

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